Sunday, 31 August 2014

Craving Desire Sneak Peek

Craving Desire will be released on Sep 2nd and you can read the Prologue below. It's book 3.5 in the Jessica Dawn series and tells Maria's story.

I didn’t think things would end like this. For years I thought my friends would find my dead body in an alley after my heart gave out to the overdose of emotion I craved. Never in a million years did I think I would be falling to my death. It’s true what they say about your life flashing before your eyes moments before you die and mine wasn’t what I wanted. I wanted a normal life with a family and a beautiful house surrounded by a white picket fence. I could have had it, I did have it but true to my nature I wrecked it all. My life was one big screw up after another and I was constantly trying to make amends. My sins weighed heavy on my soul and I knew as soon as my body hit the ground I would be going straight to hell. I’ve tried, really tried but I suppose things were never meant to be. I didn’t deserve love or the friendship others easily offered.
I should have died years ago when I was being turned into an Ethos Vampire but Brigate just had to save me. He had no right! I knew what I was doing and hoped the fucker would finally stop toying with me and kill me. Instead I was thrown deeper into the craving. Brigate had always told me it was a long road to recovery but once an addict always an addict. I convinced myself I could still love and have had that thrown back in my face too. I suppose I’m grateful in these last few seconds that I was finally alone. There was no emotion other than my own. I regretted so much and the memory of the family I’d lost came flooding back. Only Brigate knew what I had given up to the craving.

The craving, it was more than that. It had clawed itself into my very soul with the strength of the Ethos curse. I thought the love I felt for Kroll and what he felt in return was enough to hold it back but his betrayal had cut through all my restraints. Even now as the wind whipped at my face the craving was trying to spread out and find something, anything to latch onto. It knew I was about to die and was trying to save itself. The Ethos curse had twisted it into something symbiotic. Until now I had refused to see it as something living inside me. I saw it for what it was now; evil. I had managed to lock it away with the help of Brigate and Jess but the walls they had built to protect me were crumbling. It was the heartache. The heartache of losing Kroll had brought all the memories back, memories I had tried to forget but they remained. I remembered everything in these last moments and I decided death was the best thing for me.

I closed my eyes; there was no way out of the inevitable as the craving started to manifest from my body. I felt the craving start to leave my body, its final attempt to survive. The darkness began to pour from my eyes and mouth. A thick sludge was escaping to attach to another and I couldn’t let it. I held onto it for dear life as I finally hit and my body broke. I was finally at peace.

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